Tuesday, June 5, 2012

ZOMBIES VS. CANNIBALS | Weekly World News

Zombies have declared war on cannibals ? and things are eating up!

Cannibals have been everywhere in the news lately, with high-profile attacks in Florida, Maryland, Texas, Arizona and France. ? Zombies are not happy about this, not at all, and have declared war on cannibals. ?They want to rid the planet of these unwanted parasites.

But Cannibals are fighting back and have announced that they will no longer concentrate on eating living human beings, they are going after Zombies!

The battle is on!

Who will win?

The CDC is beating on Zombies. ??We announced recently that there was no Zombie apocalypse, but that was before the rash of cannibal attacks. ?Now, we see that there is an ?awakening? of Zombies across the U.S. ?And they are out to get cannibals.?

The final straw was when ?Rudy Eugene, 31, was shot and killed by police while devouring the face of a homeless man. ?Even Zombies were repulsed by this act and they announced ? through their Zombie spokesman that they would seek out to destroy all cannibals.

The Zombies are even targeting Luke Magnotta, the gay cannibal, after his arrest in Paris. ??We want his brain,? one Zombie told WWN.

Meanwhile, the cannibals have called on one of their famous elder spokesmen, Hannibal Lecter, to guide them in the battle. ?And he has agreed to join the fight.

What is the difference between Zombies and Cannibals. Well, the Zombieactionnetwork.com has provided a nice diagram to show us:

?

The brilliant Justin Miller has created a poster that has been seen in cities around America:

There have been numerous reports of battles between zombies and cannibals already coming in from around the country.

In New Jersey, several zombies jumped a cannibal and ate his brain, but then the zombies were jumped by several of the cannibal?s friends and? they were dead meat.

Americans are warned to keep your distance if you see any zombies fighting with cannibals. ??Let them fight it out amongst themselves, don?t try to stop it,? said a representative from the CDC.

Who do you think will win? ?Zombies or Cannibals?

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